Six more mornings left in our stay in Ireland. The past two days have been very "active" packing wise. Putting stuff in, weighing, taking stuff out, changing our minds about luggage: we jettisoned a smaller bag and bought a larger one. Figured it was cheaper than trying to mail stuff or leaving it behind. Looking back at the start of my blog on this adventure, I read that I was doing the very same thing in Scottsdale last December. Weighing suitcases, taking stuff out, making trips to Goodwill.
Our total worldly goods, except for a few paintings, a couple of small pieces of furniture, a couple of lamps back in a storage unit in Arizona, fit into three large suitcases and two carryons. We own no car, no bed and we have no set place to live until November 1st so it really is just us and Mitzi. It is kind of scary.
But no more scary than what people are experiencing today around the world. When we sighed this morning about having to book into a spartan Extended Stay back in Arizona, I commented that we will be sharing what many are experiencing in Houston and in the Caribbean given the hurricanes. To say nothing of people on the edge of poverty worldwide. And we are not on the edge of poverty. Our circumstances are based on our choices--we chose what we wanted to keep, what we were willing to let go of. We chose to leave the U.S., we are choosing to return. We won't be stopped at the border. We can go back to a place that is safe and dry. We have enough money to support ourselves day to day in a quite adequate way. So we are blessed and privileged and I never take that for granted.
Many people have asked me "Are you sad to be leaving? Would you do it again? What have you learned?" Well, yes, I am sad to be leaving. Moving again is very stressful and I had hoped we would make it through a year at least. I have enjoyed so much of Ireland this year, the tale is told through my blog. But it came to a point where staying was going to cost a lot more Euros. And we are facing winter, a time of dull weather, cold (increased heating costs), a time where if we haven't settled ourselves into a local routine--we haven't--we will be hunkered down in our rental staring at each other. Instead we can be in our old stamping ground in Arizona, in a community that we are familiar with and that is familiar with us. I can still have the kind of intellectual experiences, with books and the Net, that I would be having here in the winter. And I have my photos, my blog for memories. We also face some issues in our lives that will be better faced in the U.S. So leaving really is the best option--short term pain for long term gain.
Would I do it again? Truthfully, no. We thought that we would be doing this while we still had the energy and resources to do it. We had the energy at the start of this but we are now pretty well done in. And making new friends is HARD. At this stage of life it is difficult to tell my story, to immerse myself into a culture even though it is a culture that I was familiar with fifty years ago.
Do I regret doing this? No I don't. Because I DID learn some quite important things, things that are going to stand me in good stead as I move forward.
I learned a lot not only about Ireland but also about myself. I believe that I go forward a more realistic, thought-full person. One thing I learned here through my interactions with people is that many of us tend to say "it's fine" when it really ISN'T fine. We do things, say things, that impact ourselves and others in ways that really aren't good for us. And if it isn't good--in terms of wellbeing--for us, it really isn't going to be good for other people either. I feel that is one of the most valuable things I learned and if it took coming to Ireland for me to learn it, well then the journey was worth it.
I also learned that aging takes a huge toll on the body. And that unless I make health my priority--spiritual, emotional and physical health--nothing else really matters. I feel I aged quite a bit this year. Partly due to the weather, partly due to health habits. I know what I need to do now to mitigate this aging process and it will be easier to do that back in a place where there are exercise classes, warm pools, free medical (thank you Medicare!) and a better climate for arthritic bones.
Ireland is a lovely country. The Irish people are funny, they are, in the main, kind. They really don't take life too seriously. I think the attitude I encountered is summed up by what a man said to me this morning as I was walking Mitzi in the park: "It's a grand morning!" he said. It is actually cold and grey. "Yes it is," I bravely replied. I have learned there really is no point in disputing others' attitudes toward life. He continued, almost as if divining my thoughts, "And even if it isn't grand, it's better to say it is, isn't it?" And therein lies my final adieu to Ireland, the closing chapter in my book about Ireland. It is a grand country, they are grand people. Bless them all.
What a thought-full blog entry. It sounds like you are quite at peace with your decisions. And what is experience for, if not for learning? I've loved following along as an armchair tourist. Thanks, Val, for sharing your life in Ireland!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your last entry in your blog Val . Very thought provoking . I too would find it very difficult to move somewhere I am not familiar with and also facing a different culture and weather system .
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