1. What do you share?
It's funny that should be the question I read tonight because I was just talking to my husband about a book I am reading, "Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead." In the chapter entitled "Debunking the Vulnerability Myths," she describes Myth #3: Vulnerability is letting it all hang out. She says that there should always be boundaries around vulnerability; we need to trust someone, know that they will not betray us, before we share tender, intimate stuff. That's a lesson I have been slow to learn. I tend to be that person who lets it all hang out with people. For the very reason that the author (Brene Brown) denotes: it's a kind of attention-seeking. It probably comes from a childhood that was fairly lonely, where I felt "different" and different not in a good way. Anyway, those pages were a wake-up reminder to me that sharing too much is just not good. It doesn't usually (except with a couple of very close friends) make me feel closer to the person and it certainly doesn't make me feel more secure. If anything it makes me feel insecure as later, after the sharing I inwardly cringe and think to myself, "Oh why on earth did I say THAT?"
It's funny that should be the question I read tonight because I was just talking to my husband about a book I am reading, "Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead." In the chapter entitled "Debunking the Vulnerability Myths," she describes Myth #3: Vulnerability is letting it all hang out. She says that there should always be boundaries around vulnerability; we need to trust someone, know that they will not betray us, before we share tender, intimate stuff. That's a lesson I have been slow to learn. I tend to be that person who lets it all hang out with people. For the very reason that the author (Brene Brown) denotes: it's a kind of attention-seeking. It probably comes from a childhood that was fairly lonely, where I felt "different" and different not in a good way. Anyway, those pages were a wake-up reminder to me that sharing too much is just not good. It doesn't usually (except with a couple of very close friends) make me feel closer to the person and it certainly doesn't make me feel more secure. If anything it makes me feel insecure as later, after the sharing I inwardly cringe and think to myself, "Oh why on earth did I say THAT?"
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